This is the other thing that I hear all the time: “Well, Rhonda, Rhonda, Rhonda, but fear motivates me.”
I remember one of my coaching students in my coach certification program, and in our first class on Zoom, he’s like “Well, Rhonda, I have to beat myself up and I have to put myself down, because that keeps me, you know, motivated and on the edge. You know, if I put myself down, I know what I have to work on, I have to get better.”
And I go, “Really? Okay.” It was really beautiful because that day he had just spoken to a group of sixth graders. And I said, “Oh, well, did you tell the sixth graders this great strategy you have? Did you tell the sixth graders to beat themselves up and put themselves down, because that will keep them motivated the rest of their life?” And he goes, “Well…well…well, no.” I said, “Well, if it’s such a great strategy, imagine if they started in sixth grade, how much more motivated they’d be.” He got my point, right? He was like, gulp! “Oh, yeah. I don’t want to teach a sixth grader to beat themselves up.” And I said, “Yeah, and then you don’t get to do it either.”
Because fear is a great motivator, but it will never, ever let you be satisfied. I would write that down if I were you. Fear is a great motivator, but you never get satisfied if you act from fear. You never feel content. You never feel powerful. Because you got seduced. Now we’ve all been there. So fear is a great motivator, but it will never, ever let you be satisfied.
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